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Susan Meeker-Lowry's avatar

I remember many wonderful conversations about gratitude with my grandmother, and also prayer. Sometimes gratitude - for the beauty that surrounds me and even for the pain and grief I’ve experienced, the losses (of my mother, the accident that transformed my younger sister’s life forever, even the death of my oldest son), the knowings, the knowledge of the true power and scope of Love that flow from them. Yes, much of that took time. In the case of my son’s death - years. But . . . I am grateful for the fact that my heart is now cracked open and will never be closed again, for the knowing that there is no death, for the voices of all the beings of Earth - here, present, and so much a part of the beauty that moves me. Sometimes I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude that I can’t help but cry tears of joy - and there is pain in there too, for the losses, but the blessings of time and understanding and (hopefully a bit of) wisdom - I’m 70 so I do hope that’s coming along as well - they are the gifts of loss and grief. I would not change anything - though I do wish that my son was still here in the physical dimension, as I wish my mother hadn’t died so young and that my sister hadn’t had a brain injury that changed her life. Life happens. It’s all part of it.

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RiseUP with Susan May's avatar

I was recently discussing gratitude with a friend and trying to describe how gratitude naturally flows out of me - I am not trying. Every day I just look around me and am grateful for just about everything I lay my eyes on. And gratitude has pulled me out of the pit when I remember it.

I love how you frame it here and remind people that it can't be forced. And I also agree with how you've linked ingratitude to "forced gratitude" (as if it can be forced!) in childhood. Just like parents forcing children to "share". What an oxymoron!) (In my example above, I think of it as "remembering".) I love the cycle of gratitude -> generosity -> gratitude etc. Yes!

I've been working more deeply with people 1-1 and have been astounded to find that most people have no idea how to take care of themselves or what brings them joy/happiness. Now that I'm reflecting on it, it's not that surprising but it's been such a long time since I've lived that way that I'd forgotten - the obligation, the shame, the exhaustion of keeping up with everything.

I truly believe that when people's needs are taken care of they ARE generous! It's so natural for us to give when our cup is overflowing. It's a positive feedback loop as you've described here. Now, to get people to believe that they deserve to be filled up.

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